This month’s update

So true…  

I’m super good friends with my fat.  So update changes-

I’m not a regular person when it comes to my cycle. So, it turns out that my monthly weigh in and measurements are falling on the day prior to my start or on my start date. It’s throwing my numbers out of whack. So I guess I’ll be adjusting my updates based on when things end. 

Anyway, even without that, I’m behind on my weight loss this month. I should be at a 12lb loss to meet my goal date of mid-November, however I’ve fallen short.  I’m only at 8.6 lost so I’m behind by 3.4lbs. I’d love to say that my clothes are fitting better and I’ve lost inches, but no. I was doing really well until I hit the time of my cycle when I would be ovulating, then I got tired, stopped exercising and started making bad food choices. I’m wondering if this is a thing. I’m heading to the other side of the cycle and I’m wondering how things will change. I typically get less hungry during my period. If I can find a connection, I think that will be very helpful.

So there is the monthly update! I hope everyone is doing well with their goals!!

As a closing question, if you’re a woman, have you found that your cycle affects your weight loss?


Weigh In – #1

Today is update day! So how have I been doing? Not as well as I hoped, better than I thought? A little of both I’d say. 

Full disclosure, I almost didn’t do my weigh in today. It’s that time of the month, so along with my normal weight gain, I get all kinds of crazy hormonal things going on, in fact, that might be a future post. I digress…

Weight – 247.4 (down 6 lbs which was the monthly goal)

Bust and chest went up-I’m guessing hormones considering what time it is?

Bust – 52 1/2 inches

Chest – 44 inches

Natural Waist – 43 inches

Mid Waist – 50 1/2 inches

Lower Waist – 52 1/2 inches

Hips – 47 1/2 inches

Thighs – 26 inches

Upper arms – 15 1/2 inches

All other measurements went down. Hoorah!! 

Now for the pics – 

I couldn’t get a good picture from the back.

It’s a mixed bag, this post. Goods, bads, and inbetweens.

So, how are you all doing with your goals? 

How did I get here?

 Like so many others I ask myself this- How did I get here? 

I know part of it. I plateau or I give myself a day off from being accountable, and then another and another-then it’s been over a week since I have tracked my food and posted here. It’s possible it’s been two weeks.

But it’s not just that. 

Above is a screen shot of the last year. Do you see the zig-zags? Up and down, up and down, like a yo-yo. It’s depressing. It makes me angry. But I do it to myself…don’t I? Or maybe not.

I have done the math. Since 2014, if I had kept off the weight (and I haven’t even recorded all of it) I would have lost 80 lbs. 80 pounds…wow! But I lose 20 to 30 and then I put it back on. This isn’t healthy.

So what caused it? I can’t say that I have the worst food habits. They aren’t great, but not the worst. I was reading an article today about a gentleman who was eating one large pizza every night for dinner. He gave it up for a month and lost 30lbs. I gave up pizza last month. And I didn’t eat a whole pizza every day. Maybe a piece or two once or twice a week. Guess what…it made no difference. I gave up soda and chocolate candy bars too. You guessed it…it’s made no difference. I’m not angry about this, I’m just pointing out, that this isn’t my problem. 

My body is weird. It doesn’t lose and gain weight properly. I have a friend who had the VSG procedure. She has regular doctor’s visits, she sees a nutritionist. She was losing weight really fast, at first. Now she’s at a stand still. She’s eating properly, she’s obviously under medical care.  Why do I mention her? Because, she and I have always shared this problem. And with all she’s gone through, the doctors, the exercise-her body is still fighting her weight loss. Why? She is doing everything right. And that’s what makes weight loss so hard for some of us. Our bodies are fighting us. 

So the next time someone gives me that look (and you may know what I mean). That look that says: “Ugh, she’s so lazy.” “Oh my gosh, why doesn’t she try to lose weight?” “She should eat better and not eat so much.” and “She should exercise.” I hope someone out there will have read this and understand that, yes, some people do eat poorly and not exercise, and then there are some of us that have other and issues. It’s not always that we are lazy or that we are eating too much. There are other things at play that have got us to where we are today. And they have no idea what we are doing to try to get ourselves healthy and happy. 

Happy Fat Tuesday

Ahh, Fat Tuesday. I’m not going all out, but since my husband and I are giving up pizza for Lent, and a few other things, I indulged and made gluten free pizza. 

I feel awful. 

It’s amazing how it’s so hard to start eating healthy. But then you do it and when you revert back to old eating habits, even just for a day, you start to feel bad. BUT (the big but) how easy it is to slip back into bad eating habits despite how bad you might feel. 

Isn’t it curious?  Isn’t this relationship that we have with food-mind and body-crazy? 

I’ll be honest. I was afraid to have my Dr. Pepper (which I’m also giving up)  and pizza today because I was so scared I would slip back into bad habits so easily. I’m not saying I won’t, but if I can remember how my stomach and intestines feel right this moment…it will give me pause. 

How about you all? Do any of you feel this way? 


Goals – Why and Do We Need Them?

For the last two years I have been trying to lose weight. I lose 20 to 30lbs and then I gain it all back. This yo-yoing has gotten old.

I few days ago I asked myself why? I’ve lost weight in the past and kept if off. Why not now? Thinking back I found a common theme. I was losing weight for someone or something.  

 Well, that’s why I’ve set a firm time goal. I hope this is my answer. In the past when I’ve lost weight, I realize that I had a time frame associated with it. But to just lose weight because I “need” to, seems not to be working. I’m still trying to figure out why I need a goal, but that I’ve acknowledged the fact is a first step, right?

As I’ve posted before, mid November is my first goal. That’s my husband’s 40th bday and we are taking a trip. I want to feel good and healthy. I do not want to be winded and feel uncomfortable in my skin.

I keep visualizing myself on this trip-Anytime I get hungry after I’ve already eaten-Or when I want that chip/dip/cookie/brownie/cake/ice cream/etc or a I feel a binge coming on, I envision myself on our trip. I think about the clothes I want to wear. I think about being able to wear a nice skirt and top to dinner, and eating (reasonably) what I want without worrying what other people are thinking. I envision myself knowing that the next day, I’ll make good choices because I’ve learned something, and because I feel better we will get out and move. 

This is going to be a very active trip. I NEED to feel good and comfortable. It’s not only a present to my husband, but a present to me. 

Fingers crossed! Hopefully a solid reason to commit will help me lose the weight!

How about you? Do you need a firm time goal? Or something to work toward? What motivates you?


My Plan, My Goals

In the past, when I’ve started a diet and exercise, I jump into it whole heartedly. I give 110%. I lose about 20/25lbs and then I stop losing. Since I’ve been so into it, I have no calories to cut and no exercises to add. Plus, at this point I’m burnt out. I do not want to exercise or diet anymore. I give up and the weight just piles on again.

This time, I’m doing things differently.

The Plan

Food – I’m starting out with small changes this time-Cutting out nibbling (not really snacks), logging EVERYTHING that I eat and drink. I’m trying to eat less bread and more vegetables. I’m not cutting out overt sugars yet.

Exercise – Again I’m keeping it simple. I’m starting out with standing elbow to knees exercises, holding a plank (as perfectly as I can) for thirty seconds, and I’ve been adding variations each day.

I’ve found that recently when I’ve tried to get into cardio, I’m so tired I just don’t want to do it. I’m trying to strengthen my arms, legs, and core first. I’m hoping that makes cardio easier again. 

My goal for exercise is to start cardio in the next two weeks. I’ll start at 5 mins a day and increase each week. I also want to start a morning and evening yoga practice. My long term goal is to get into the gym and attend a YoBarre class. 


My Goal

As I said in my first post, my goal is 60 by 40. Sixty pounds in eight months. I have a secondary goal after I meet this one. 40 by 40. I want to lose forty more pounds in six months in time for my 40th birthday. 

I know I will hit plateaus, but I hope to stay strong this time and not slide backwards.

Speaking of plateaus, how do you work through them?

Sixty by Forty

I’ve been reluctant to start this blog. Why? Good question. Because it might make me accountable? Because I’m embarrassed? Yes. Yes to all.

Someone tried to tell me I wasn’t fat, I was curvy. I’m not delusional. Curvy was like 30lbs ago and even then, it was curves and lumpiness at best.

These ladies have curves-

Ashley Graham, I think


I couldnt find her name


I’d be perfectly happy if I looked like this


This girl does not have curves-


She’s a chunky, lumpy mess. I’m not body shaming anyone or myself. I’m being realistic.  If I looked like this, and was healthy and felt good, I’d be okay with it. But I’m not. I do not feel good. I do not have energy. I’m tired all of the time and I’m not comfortable in my skin. This has to stop, so I’m starting this journey.

I’ve decided my goal is 60lbs by mid-November. It’s my husband’s 40th bday (60 by 40) and we’ve planned a trip. I want to enjoy this with him. So, I’ve set a goal. (There will be another post about goals).

I’ll be making monthly updates with weight measurements and pictures. I’ll wear the same outfit each month.  I’ll post things that I find helpful, inspirational, etc. 

I started officially on February 1st. So 3 days in, I’m still feeling strong. Good luck to all of us on our weight loss journey! 

Starting weight and measurements:

254 lbs

Bust – 50 inches

Chest – 43 inches

Natural Waist – 43 inches

Mid Waist – 52 inches

Lower Waist – 53 inches

Hips – 49 inches

Thighs – 27 1/2 inches

Upper arms – 16 inches